I was in session with a young man who was explaining his frustration with friends and family relying on him for endless emotional support. He went on to explain that when he needed someone to talk to about his frustrations, everyone was too busy or brushed off his concerns. He did not understand why he felt a commitment to be there for others, but they did not reciprocate this. It is important to be mindful when others attempt to bombard you with their problems.
Caring does not equal an obligation to solve another’s problems. Instead learn to have healthy boundaries that allow others a space to think critically about a workable solution and simply offer support during the process. Why is it important not to overload ourselves with other people’s issues? Simply put, you cannot control that person or the situation they are dealing with.
Learn to have awareness when you have reached a point where you must say to your friend or family member, I feel for your situation but maybe you should seek professional advice. Make sure you are taking time to be kind to yourself. Incorporate a simple mantra into your daily routine that reinforces principles of self-compassion. Here are some tips that may help you get started.
Celebrate small accomplishments.
Participate in activities that you enjoy.
Exercise regularly
Use positive self-talk.
Give yourself permission to give yourself grace.
Get matched with a licensed therapist!